so much in pain

that day, my heart collapsed but I’m not telling you that,
even if i scream how painful it is, these unforgettable memories
will not change the way i live my life,
i still can’t see changes, still darkness flowing into my body and soul
i still can’t see the sunshine that makes my day one of a kind
so, I’ll still feel depressed tomorrow…

and now.. what will i do?

tinge of hope

It’s so hard to live your life knowing the person you want to be with for the rest of your life
is in fact living with someone he wants to be with for the rest of his life.

How could Love allow to let this heart be broken?
Should you go on because you believe that true love waits,

hoping this someone might notice us,
wishing that this someone feels the same way too one of this days.

How long can we be hopeful?

How long can a believer have to wait?

Everyone is waiting for that somehow, someday…

But why does it have to be this way?

Why is it every time I fall in love I fail. Maybe that’s why its called “falling” in love.

Even if I’m not going to push my feelings, it grows itself, and you don’t know how to stop it, and of course you don’t want to stop it.

I don’t want to love someone just to forget him, I don’t wanna be a user, I don’t want to hurt people because i know exactly how it feels when love fails.

It hurts so much.. so much hurt to the extend that you could not even raise yourself up from bed.

too many tears waste for unreasonable reason, too many time waste for this stupid feelings just because you cannot accept the fact that the person you love cannot love you back.

you cannot accept the fact that he never had a single tinge of feeling for you anymore.

and that’s the most painful thing you’ll ever know.

tell me, what should i do?

Live in dreams, illusions, pretensions?

I’m tired that I can no longer shed even a single tear,
I’m tired that I could almost die.
I’m tired being the only person in the world that cannot be love.
I’m tired of wishing, hoping and waiting.
but I never get tired of loving you.

and by now I little by Little realize the essence of death
the only thing that takes place right after resentment

If only pain can be washed away by just soaking yourself in the ocean
then I would not need to worry of getting hurt over and over again

and I would wholeheartedly love you every now and then.

If only dreams and wishes come true
if and only if will come true,

then for sure I would have a perfect life to live on.

but hell no! the entire thing was a huge lie

outright frustration, utter confusion…

and when I’m gone. Please keep a picture of me

I will still be waiting for you.

maybe, over there, we are meant for each other.

and I’m still hoping and this tinge of Hope will be here forever in my heart

I love you so much… Farewell

no more happiness

I bind my heart from falling in love with you

I chose to stay away so I won’t be seeing you

I will try to forget you so I won’t be distracted

It may be hard but it’s the only way to live life completely

 

I love you

 so I bind you from falling in love with others

I bind you from Happiness

I promise, I’ll make sure you will feel the same thing too

You will feel pain, anger, resentment and hurts.

 

I bind myself from hurting others and myself.

 

nostalgia

 if this is the meaning of this word then let me tell you, i miss you, the memory that we had still linger in my mind, 

 I always wanted to be with you, every single day, every night i dreamed of you,  the emotion that passes through my mind made me cry, it made me feel like im living my life alone in the dark room, 

 How can I forget you, its been years since you broke up with me but still i can not just let it go, i can’t get over you, i can’t see anyone that can replace you in my heart, because all i want is you, your my life, your the air that i breathe, your my everything, but nothing has ever ever happend because you left me, you left me, you left me…